Chapter 61: A few of my new obsessions

Food: Açai! (It's a Brazilian rainforest fruit that's an ambrosial mix of chocolate and fruit. Utterly addictive). Oh, it was a happy, happy, happy day when I found the best I've ever tasted outside of Brazil, here at a health food store in Sydney. But then, I made a terrible mistake. I told one Brazilian friend about it, and he told all of his friends, and the news spread like wildfire amongst those eager networkers, and now the bastards have made a run on the health food store and they don't have any more of it and I am grieving.
TV program: Damages, with Glenn Close as a litigation lawyer, she's complex, manipulative, evil, and entirely compelling. In one scene, she's blackmailing a fellow lawyer (picture below) to throw a case:
"You're a baptist, right Ray?" (HE NODS SUSPCIOUSLY). She leans forward (SILENCE, A PAUSE) and whispers "Repent!"
Brilliant! Only Glenn Close could make a whisper sound like a scream.

Pastime: On-line Scrabble. I've now won 22 out of 23 games, losing so far only to Kelley Korbin. That's not going to happen again. Anyway, I got even, whupping her ass in a subsequent game with DETHRONE on a double word pink tile plus my bonus 50 points for getting all 7 tiles down at once. So there, KK! Nyah, nyah, nyah! If anyone wants to play, drop me a line!

And I would like to commend my friend Ziad, who lives in Kuwait, for always playing his turn so promptly! I suppose some people would call him an enabler, but as a Scrabble addict I am ever so grateful. And of course, my gratitude increased boundlessly when Ziad gave me a K so that I could lay down JOKE on a triple word-score red-tile with my J falling neatly (Did anyone say Divine Plan?) on a double letter-score blue score, so that I collected 69 sweet, delicious, lovely, succulent points. Ziad said afterwards that "Peter W, aka Scrabblezilla, was wreaking havoc on Kuwait City". And later still, when the reality of the scale of his defeat had sunk in he told me he'd been placed on "Scrabble Suicide Watch".

But it's hard for people to cope with Scrabble Genius. For example, my friend Kelley sent me this lovely Scrabble poem which one of her fellow-on-line-scrabbling friends sent to another after suffering a severe losing streak. I think it's utter genius:

Beeyatch

dearest friend
our game is at an end
I have places to go
and money to spend
while you for sheer luck
blithely ascend
to the scrabble
hall of fame
you who pulled the Q, the J, the X, two S's and most of the E's.
Skill, yup yup yup yup yup yup
Mensa, yup yup yup
Sure whateveryou say.
Have a nice day
and enjoy your ground glass soup.

If anybody wants to play scrabble with me let me know. It works via email. You can take your turn whenever you like. Please play with me. Pretty PRETTY PLEASE!

Music: Raindrops on roses, whiskers on kittens...... Nah, just kidding. I hate that schmaltzy song, fuck the Sound of Music and Julie Andrews. Instead, try Kate Nash. She's a cross between Catherine Tate and Bjork, with deeply profound yet utterly hilarious lyrics. I LOLed repeatedly listening to her album. My favourite song is Foundations. (Click on the word foundations to see the video of this song.)

Video: Actually, though, Kate Nash, though a brilliant songstress, makes shitty videos. Here's my favourite video currently, the latest Dolce & Gabbana underwear ad. If you're gay, viewing is obligatory, but make sure you have a towel handy.